Motherhood or Waste Management?

I did not realize before becoming a parent that it is one of the most beautiful, rewarding, and disgusting jobs you could ever have. In the short 9 months that Noah has been alive I have seen some things. I will not disturb you with all of the daily nastiness that is parenthood but I will give you a few of the more impressive highlights.

A Crappy Trip to Target

A few weeks ago I went on a routine trip to target with my freshly bathed baby in tow. When we walked in the doors I smelled something less than pleasant and realized that it was coming from my child. We quickly headed back to the bathroom to take care of the smelly situation.

Like any responsible and prepared mom, I had my diaper bag with me.  Of course I am always prepared for just such an occasion so I keep my bag stocked with all of the necessities: diapers, plenty of wipes, and that handy dandy extra outfit... except for today.

I opened up this monstrosity of a diaper, and let's just say it was not contained to just the diaper. I go to pull out the 12.4 million wipes that will be needed to clean up the catastrophe and there is ONE lone wipe in the box. One wipe would not even put a dent in this job.

So, there I was, trying to keep one hand on Noah so that he would not fall off of the changing table and reaching as far as I possibly could to the paper towels trying to get enough of them wet to get my son at least somewhat clean. Meanwhile he is screaming at the top of his lungs and more than one Target customer and employee have come in and stared at me as if they were minutes away from calling Children's Protective Services.

At the end of it all we proudly walked out of target. I was wearing random spots of poop on my shirt and Noah was wearing only a diaper and his jacket. Nothing was purchased.

Merry Christmas to All and to All a Good Vomit

Christmas day was spent as usual this year. We traveled all over Memphis visiting our family members and sharing food presents, and germs. My poor little family has been passing around a cold for about a week and since there is no canceling Christmas, we carried on with the festivities. Unfortunately, it was all a little too much for Noah.

When we finally arrived home at the end of the day we got Noah ready for bed. All of the lights were turned off except for the glow of the Christmas lights and we were peacefully sitting together as a family reflecting on a great Christmas day.

This beautiful family moment came to a sudden halt when our son defied the laws of gravity by projectile vomiting all over everyone in the room. As first time parents, neither Brandon nor I had ever seen anything quite like this before and we were pretty impressed that such a great volume of fluid could come out of such a tiny person.

After spending a substantial amount of time cleaning up everything that was in the line of fire we got Noah safely off to sleep. I suppose he just wanted to make sure that his first Christmas was a memorable one. And Brandon and I were able to put another notch on the parental experiences belt.

Anyway, I say all of this, not to gross anyone out, but because this is my life now. I see poop and other bodily fluids on a daily basis and I'm ok with it. Being a mom means being a lot of other things, too: a caretaker, a nurse, a disciplinarian, a cuddler.

And, unfortunately, sometimes it means being a toilet.

The Superman List

Well I have only been married for 1.75 years now so I do not have an abundance of experience and wisdom to share with the world as far as marital advice. What I do have are SUPER man-picking powers. I would like to share with you a little bit about this man that has for some reason taken on the task of putting up with me for the rest of his life. Take notes single ladies. This is what you want in a husband.

When I was 15 years old I made a list of all of the things that I wanted in my future husband. My 15 year old self would swoon if she only knew the kind of man that I ended up with. If you are not married yet, I would encourage you to make a list and start praying for that man. I could write an obnoxiously long list of all of the wonderful things about Brandon Nicholas Davis but I will do my best to keep it to my most favorites.

1. He loves the Lord.

Brandon did not grow up in a Christian home like I did. He came to know God all by himself when he was a teenager. His story amazes me. You should ask him about it sometime. It takes a tremendous amount of strength and faith to develop a relationship with the Lord without the support and accountability of family.  He has such a pure and genuine faith. He asks questions, and does not put up with insincere answers. He seeks a relationship with God that is real and he leads our family to do the same.

2. He is slow to anger.  

I will admit that I am not a very patient person. I can get a little heated from time to time. My husband however, is the most even-tempered person you will ever meet. I tend to get loud when I feel passionate about something. Brandon likes to quietly discuss things in a rational way. It's kind of ridiculous. Even though I get very frustrated with his calm and collected ways in the middle of a fight it is also one of the things I love the most about him. It takes a great deal of maturity and control to be both loving and calm when you are angry and my husband has somehow mastered this skill.


3. He is warm and affectionate.

My most favorite place to be in the whole world is wrapped up in Brandon's arms. He gives very warm and healing hugs. He comforts me without even saying a word. Physical touch is definitely one of my love languages so it was important to find an affectionate man. He also has a very warm and comforting personality. He always cares about the things that bother me, no matter how big or small they may be. He knows how to love me the way that I need to be loved.

4. He is a family man.

I have always known that I wanted to have a big family. I knew that I had to find a husband that would be a good father. I knew Brandon would be a great dad when we were dating, but he has far exceeded all of my expectations. The way he loves our son is beautiful. I melt into a puddle every time I see them snuggled up together taking a nap. I could go on and on but I think this video says it all.

5. He is a wonderful communicator.

I think that, stereotypically, the girl is usually the better communicator in the relationship, but that is not the case in my marriage. Brandon is a talker. He is a very gifted storyteller. He has always had a knack for knowing what I'm thinking and helping me talk through my feelings. I cherish this gift. I have learned more about myself since I have known Brandon than ever before. He doesn't let me draw up into myself. He is so easy to talk to and there is nothing on earth that I wouldn't tell him. 

6. He is hilarious.

We have so much fun together! Life is hard and it throws some pretty serious situations at you sometimes. It's good if you have a partner to help you not take yourself too seriously, especially in tough times. We are silly. We make ridiculous inside jokes and tell them to each other ALL the time!  Sometimes all you can do is laugh, and it helps if you have someone who is hilarious to make you laugh.


7. He is respectable. 

Ok, ladies. There is something you need to know. All men, no matter who they are, need respect. It is engrained in them. They crave it. One of the greatest gifts you could ever give the men in your life is respect. I have no trouble respecting my husband. He is worthy of my respect in so many ways. I respect his leadership in our family. I respect his work ethic and the way that he provides for us. I respect his gentleness and sincerity. I could go on and on. Respect your man. Find a man who is worthy of your respect and show it to him. 

I know that I have just gushed out a lot of very lovey dovey things. I say all of this to say that I have married the perfect man... just kidding.

I know that he is not perfect. No one is. He can be frustrating, we get on each other's nerves, and we can argue with the best of them. However--

He is perfect for me. And those things that I listed as a 15 year old make the rough times not so bad, and the good times even better. Figure out what you need in a partner and do not settle for anything less. Marriage is hard, so share it with someone who you will fight for even at the hardest of times. Share it with someone who at the end of your life you can look back and say, "I was better with him/her than I ever would have been without."

Here are some photos of the previously mentioned sillyness.

Our Little Fresh Prince

"Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the"


...Mom of a kid called Noah. 

If you did not stop reading while I was being a nerd, I will tell the story of how our little unplanned bundle of joy came to be. Brandon and I got married in March. And, like any wise couple, we had already discussed when we wanted to start our family. We thought that between 3 and 5 years would be a good amount of time. In that time we would get on our feet financially, probably purchase a home, travel, and do other kid-free things.

God had other plans for us. In July of 2012 I peed on a stick and to my surprise that stick said "Hey! You are going to be someone's mom in 9 months." And all of a sudden life got real. Money? Who needs money? Home ownership? Overrated! And hey! We had 9 long months to get all of those kid-free activities out of our system. I don't have an actual picture of what Brandon's face looked like when I shared the news with him but here is a recreation of it.

We were unsure about a lot of things during my pregnancy. Brandon did not have a full-time job yet. We did not know where we were going to live when the baby got here. How were we going to pay for things? How do you raise a human-being to become an at least half way decent person? AAAAAAHHHHHH! Scary stuff. 

What we were sure of was that God is bigger than all of our uncertainty. I'm not saying that we always did a good job of trusting in him during those scary days but when it came down to it we both believed that God had a plan and that he would take care of us. We also are blessed with an amazing support system. We have a lot of family who all love us very much. 

Even though we had our doubts at times God answered every single one of our prayers. Brandon got hired at an advertising agency full time 2 months before Noah was born. We found a house to rent that we love 1 month before Noah was born. And as far as knowing how to raise a human being, unfortunately he did not come out with the instruction manual that we prayed for, but we are learning as we go. Besides how could someone as cute as this be that hard to handle anyway? (She naively said on her first day of motherhood).

That tiny little bundle has been the biggest blessing in our life. I am so glad that I get to spend 3 to 5 more years with him than I had originally planned. Now, 9 months later, we are starting to somewhat get our life back under control after the explosion of having a new baby but every day when I look at this little creation that God threw into our lives I am reminded that there is no way that Brandon and I can handle this task on our own. He is God's. We are only here for God to use to guide his path. He is my constant reminder that I am not in control and I don't need to be. God's plan is always better than my own. I mean look at this awesomeness!